28 lessons I learned by the age of 28
When thinking about what I have learned by the age of 28, this quote by Maya Angelou briefs my thoughts in the best possible way.
“Life loves the liver of it. You must live and life will be good to you”.
– Maya Angelou
It was always a matter of choices. I believe that every person that I met in my life gave me a lesson. Sometimes I find myself catching a certain moment while talking to someone, and I feel that a particular phrase that this person just said was a message delivered to me. A message that I need to learn from, take into my mind and hold it there.
1. There is no need to rush decisions.
Do not stress yourself when you do not know the answer to something or you are not sure how to act in a certain situation. Sometimes a bit of time and listening to your heart is all you need. Look inside of yourself, keep calm and you will find your answer.
2. Nothing is permanent.
Life is a constant move. Some periods seem to last forever, but everything has an end and a new time will arrive. Tomorrow is a new day and it might be better or less good than today. However, one thing is for sure, it is a part of your journey.
“I don’t know where I’m going from here, but I promise it won’t be boring”.
-David Bowie
3. Every day is a process.
Mary Oliver said, “All eternity is in the moment”. Every minute is a whole life. When we start looking at it this way, we learn to appreciate it more and enjoy this very moment and this very day. Every day is an essential part of our entire life story.
4. You have a path of your own that you need to walk calmly.
Do not stress about hard times or if something does not go the way, you want it to. It goes as it goes. There must be something right about it. In most cases, we can understand what it was only a while after. Just make sure you are doing your best and stay connected to yourself.
5. Take risks.
“He who is not courageous enough to take risks will accomplish nothing in life”.
-Muhammed Ali.
I believe that each one of us has a place of a personal growth to reach. Without taking risks, we will not be able to reach them. Walking in a comfortable path of life will keep us safe and relaxed. Once you step out of your comfort zone, this is when you start growing.
6. Be patient.
Things do not always happen as fast as we want them to happen. The right people not always step into our lives, as we would hope them to. We do tend to want everything here and now, satisfy a demand and move on. We want to do as much as possible, as fast as possible. Come, take it, and leave.
When we accomplish the art of patience, the real process begins. Being ready to wait while keeping on acting patiently, gives us the true joy from the process.
Moreover, it helps us to stay calm.
7. Listen and observe.
“We have two ears and one mouth so that we can listen twice as much as we speak.”
― Epictetus
The moment is worth it all. Sometimes when you take a step back and just observe the world around you, people, movements, you can notice so much you have not seen before. I have realized that very often we are busy with being busy, too trapped in the circle of doing things. Forgetting to stop for a second and just listen, and observe.
8. All obstacles are illusions.
It should not be about whether you will get there or not, it is about how long it will take you and how hard the journey will be. Once you have decided something, go for it.
Do not let the difficulties stop you. Make them fade away with your persistence.
9. Life is about enjoying the moment.
Thinking about tomorrow all the time, worrying, doubting, not letting yourself just be. It is a trap that we put ourselves in, without even realizing how much we are missing. I have learned to let myself be and discovered so much joy inside of my soul. I even found out that my laughter sounds and feels different when I am truly enjoying the moment I am living.
10. Keep it simple.
If you do not like something, stay away from it.
Life is not about forcing ourselves to do the things that are “right”. There is no such thing as right or wrong. If it feels right, give it a try.
The best answer is always in your heart. Our inner world knows more than we can imagine. Let your heart lead you. Do not complicate things. There is no need to try to find solutions to problems that do not exist yet. When you will get to the bridge, then you will cross it.
11. Do not try to satisfy everyone.
If a person does not feel right to you, do not force it.
There are no wrong people. There are people that we just do not share the same energy with. Whether it is a friend, a family member or just a random person we meet, sometimes it just does not feel good. Do not try to change yourself or the person next to you. It will just make both of you feel miserable and not yourselves. You will both end up feeling miserable and lost.
12. You will always get where you need to be.
The only question is how long it will take you. It all depends on how patiently will you listen to your heart and how accurately will you notice the signs around you. Cause they are always there. The more attentive you are, the more intuitive you let yourself be, the closer to yourself you will get.
13. Nowhere is better, it can only be better inside of us.
One of the scariest and saddest things for me is when I hear people complaining about how none interesting their life is and that they need to move somewhere else or breakup with their partner, because somewhere else and somebody else is definitely better. Believing that it has nothing to do with the fact that they are the boring ones. True fulfillment can be found only inside of us. Nowhere and no one but us can ever provide us the true inner satisfaction we are looking for. Look inside of yourself.
14. The ego is an enemy. Kindness is a friend.
When I first realized that there is a thing that lives in us called ego, I did not completely understand how destructive it is for us, and how much work it takes to eliminate it from our minds. I am not even sure if it can be ever all gone, but it can definitely be placed in a very strict control. I find ego one of the biggest enemies of a person, of all relationships and one of the main reasons for conflicts in interaction in between people. I taught myself to put kindness in the first place, put ego as far as possible from my mind and let the kindness be my best friend and lead.
“Practice kindness all day to everybody and you will realize you are already in heaven now”.
-Jack Kerouac
15. Searching for yourself is the main task.
I would say only one thing that I have always believed in about this subject. Our main search in life is for our own selves.
When we follow the path that is truly for us, the right person will be just right there, at the exact right moment.
16. Be happy and grateful.
This is my life motto. Just choose it. Happiness is a state of mind. I choose it every morning when I wake up. I think about it from the very first second when I open my eyes and until I fall asleep. It is not always easy, and I am not always on the same energy level. However, I choose to be grateful every single day for the good and the non-positive experiences I had, have and will always have in life because it is all part of the process. There is always what to be grateful for.
17. We are all equally good.
People can be very cruel and judgmental. Place other people into categories and decide whether someone is good enough or not.
When I was a child, I saw pallets of colors in my mind when I spoke to someone. The pallets were all different, some more bright and some less. It is not because someone was better or less good for me. It is simply how I felt about being around that person. We are all equally good. We are just different.
John Lennon said it best, “Don’t judge what you don’t understand”.
18. Elevation requires separation.
In order to grow, we must come out of our comfort zone. We need to separate ourselves from things we know and feel comfortable with and expose ourselves to new experiences in order to reach new heights.
19. You are enough.
You are good enough as you are. You do not need anyone to be telling you this. You do not need to wait for the love of your life to be happy, or to accomplishing your dreams. You were born into this life to carry your own mission and role in life. Walk your path proudly and do your thing.
“The most common way people give up their power is by thinking they don’t have any”.
-Alice Walker
20. When something is truly yours, it will come to your life.
Don’t rush things and do waste time on worrying, whenever someone or something goes away from your life, it means it is time to let it go. Nothing that is truly yours will never go away from you.
21. Take the best out of every person you meet.
Whether it is a person that you just randomly met or a person, with whom you had a deep connection.
This person brought something into your life. Let yourself see it.
22. Let people go. They will be back if it has to be so.
This is probably one of the most sensitive and hard things to do. Sometimes we really want someone to stay in our lives. I have faced situations when I really did not want to let go. When I did everything and more than I possibly could and decided to fight. However, we cannot grasp the wind with our hands. It will go and everything will renew, and come back. Maybe yes, and maybe not. I learned to accept every situation with love. Now I know that the best is to do what feels right but making sure that I am not losing my balance.
23. Nothing is a mistake.
Everything is a lesson and nothing is a mistake. Regret nothing; cherish every memory, whether it is a good experience or of a non-positive one. Be grateful for every lesson life sends you. It means you are growing.
24. Do not forget your principles.
Wherever you go, whoever you meet and whatever you do, stay loyal to yourself and do not leave behind your life guidelines and truth. It is only yourself, who you have to follow. Trying to be someone else will only make you confused and unbalanced and distance yours from your own real inner self.
25. Being honest and real means a lot.
Saying things as they are is important. Being honest with yourself and your surrounding makes things so much simpler.
26. Miracles exist.
Sometimes it is not about the miracle, it is about not giving up. Be strong and keep searching for what you are after. Keep calling for it and life will answer you. Because, Everything you can imagine is real.
27. Everything that has to happen, has already happened.
Don’t stress out. Do yourself this favor. Life is a journey we are watching unfold. Follow the steps, listen to your intuition and to your body speak. It will all workout.
28. All the light you need is already inside of you.
With Love,
Yana